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Birth
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Little Brother is born
Early Childhood: At 4, I temporarily move to Norway with my mother while she is pregnant with my little brother. My parents couldn’t afford prenatal care in the US, so they decided it would be best for my mother and I to be in Norway where she could receive free healthcare as a citizen. I remember desperately missing my dad and being deeply upset that my family had been separated.
Macrosystem: Prenatal healthcare was not affordable for my family due to its cost in the US. -
Moving from Arizona to Minnesota
Middle Childhood: When I was 6 moved from AZ to MN in the middle of February when my grandfather was dying. I was so upset that we were moving. I had to leave my friends and school behind. In addition, I hated the cold. The move was supposed to be temporary, but my parents didn’t move back for another 15 years. I often felt resentful over having stayed in MN for so long.
Microsystem: My entire extended family came together to be with my grandfather as he died. -
9/11 & leaving public school
Middle Childhood: I was 9 and in school when the planes hit the towers. Afterwards, the schoolboard wanted to make the Pledge of Allegiance mandatory. When my parents pointed out the illegality, the school bus stopped picking me up and my friends were told they couldn’t play with me. My parents ended up pulling me out of public school and I was homeschooled for the next 6 years.
Exosystem: The national reaction and turmoil due to 9/11 directly impacted my ability to stay in public school. -
Enrolling in Community College
Adolescence: When I was 16, I was able to enroll in Community College for free due to a state program that allowed me to earn my associate’s degree alongside my high school diploma. This is where I met the person who would be my best friend for 15 years before becoming my wife. Attending allowed me to earn college credit, making it easier to apply to a 4-year university when I studied for my bachelor's degree.
Macrosystem: The program is state-wide, and all students are eligible to apply for it. -
Moving to Norway
Adolescence: When I was 18, I moved to Norway to permanently claim my citizenship by living and working there for a year. I first met my ex-husband there and ended up staying a year longer than intended while we worked on his student visa so that he could move to the US with me when I came back. This experience taught me self-sufficiency and opened my eyes to other ways of living and thinking.
Exosystem: I inherited my Norwegian citizenship through my mother, who was born and raised there. -
Receiving BA, moving to Arizona, & starting in social services
Early Adulthood: I finished my bachelor’s degree when I was 22. Following that, I moved to Arizona to be closer to my parents (who had moved). This is the time when I got my first official job in social services as a client advocate at a domestic violence shelter and fell in love with social work.
Microsystem: This period of my life centered around my work and my family. I discovered a love for social work, and I was reconnecting with my family after having established my sense of independence. -
Getting married & 2016 election
Early Adulthood: When I was 24, I got married. I wasn’t particularly interested in marrying, but my boyfriend’s school visa was expiring, and it was the only way for him to stay in the US and get a green card. This was also the year that Trump was elected for his first term, and I remember a deep feeling of disappointment in my fellow countrymen.
Macrosystem: Due to US immigration law, I was backed into a corner and had no choice but to marry my boyfriend or say goodbye. -
Attending the police academy & my mom dies
Early Adulthood: At 25, I tried to pursue my interest in criminal justice and applied to the Phoenix Police Department. I was accepted and began attending the Phoenix Police Academy. I made it halfway through before it became clear that my mom’s cancer diagnosis would take her life soon. I left the Academy and went to spend my mom’s final days with her.
Microsystem: My mom’s death had a strong impact on my family and me. This is the time that my mental health took a large swing to the negative. -
Getting divorced
Early Adulthood: When I was 28, my husband and I split up. We realized that we wanted different things in life. He also wanted to return to Norway, whereas I wanted to stay in the US. Our divorce was amicable and positive, but painful. I still miss him sometimes.
Microsystem: Our decision to divorce was a personal choice between the two of us. -
Remarrying
Early Adulthood: When I was 31, I got remarried, this time to my best friend of 15 years. While the decision to marry was a personal decision between the two of us, as two people assigned female at birth, we only recently received the right to do so.
Macrosystem: My wife and I would not have been able to marry if not for the 2015 US Supreme Court case that legalized gay marriage. Despite legalization though, cultural opposition remained high. -
2024 election
Early Adulthood: I was 32 last year when the election happened. The lead-up was incredibly stressful and my wife and I were very concerned about the outcome. We made sure to vote and that everyone we know voted too. We didn’t win though and now we’re both concerned about our safety and the safety of our friends.
Macrosystem: The election results are having a direct impact on those of us in the LGBTQIA+ community. -
Now
Early Adulthood: I’m now 33 and studying for my second master’s degree. My wife and I are making sure that we have everything set up in case we need to leave for Norway for the purposes of safety.
What I learned: There is no such thing as not being influenced by these ecosystems. Everything combines to impact us and provide us with unique life experiences. This is not just true for us, but also for those we serve, and that fact needs to remain at the front of our minds as we work.